What is the proper response when I hear my own thoughts asking, “what am I to do if things stay the way they are today…am I always going to feel this lonely, this sad, this empty, this hopeless…what would happen if I just gave up…”
I wrestle through the times that my thinking is brings me down and I am desperate to know when the struggle will end. When my emotions get the best of me and I find myself feeling as if things will never change…that I may be stuck in the sadness and tire of the fight.
A significant part of me really does feel bad to entertain thoughts of giving up. I feel guilty because I know some of the verses that I needed to echo in order to repeat truth and the honest answer to that dilemma is…in and of myself, I didn’t have the strength to keep reminding myself of the truth.
In my weakness and weariness I long for release from the pain…I am exhausted from the hurt that keeps me company. It feels like an unwanted guest that has overstayed its welcome. I feel irritable and impatient. I no longer looked at the possibilities of the gifts that it offers as it touches my life. Instead, I feel resentment building and the increasing inability to address this squatter in a way that in the end is honoring to me. It feels like the hurt will be a part of my life indefinitely.
So God, help me ask the question or bring another who can direct me in bringing my heart and mind back to you. Help me to see that I can lift my eyes and remind myself that the way that I feel is not the way it is always going to be. Help me to remember that it is only a matter of time when I will be able to see that all the pain and the overwhelming feelings will have a purpose. God help me to take my eyes off my circumstances and know that as I journey through this tough place that I can find solace and peace as I run to you with my struggle.
Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.”
When my days may feel like I’m about to be undone by the crucible of sorrow…or that I am stuck in a storm of chaos and turmoil…or that I cannot hold my head above the water for one more moment…
Help me to bathe in the comfort of your word that tells me you are with me.
Help me to remember that I will have troubles in this world and that I need not be afraid of them.
You will not sit by and allow the circumstances of this world to drown me. Nor will You allow the heat and the intensity of the fire that blazes around me to consume me. Help me hold onto the truth that no matter what I feel as my earthly eyes see only the storm that surrounds me…it is for a season…and it will be over soon.
2 Corinthians 4: 17-18 “For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever. So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.”
God help me to thank you in the middle of my storm. Help me to sing praise when I’m discouraged and my life feels like a mess. Help me to choose to lift my hands in gratitude for the situation that I find myself in…when my tears cannot be held back…when the trial feels too hard…when I can’t hold on to joy. Help me to be willing to share my pain with others. Thank you that you are my Prince of Peace, that you are my strength, that you will still the storms in my life. Father God, I know that it is because of my limited human perspective that I get discouraged and even though in this moment I fail to see the blessing—I am deeply thankful for your faithfulness, protection, provision, power and undeniable love. God I thank you for your goodness and your mercy.