Music, Laughter, and a Dash of Humility: Fusion 2016

Jen CudmoreFaith, MotherhoodLeave a Comment

Humility comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes.

I learned that last weekend at Fusion Alaska, the statewide youth conference.

My days started at 6am and ended about 10pm. I rose early to cook meals, pray over the event, and prep for my classes. I had errands to run. I had teens to feed and transport. I had normal responsibilities at home.

As a mom, I can handle a little chaos. Sometimes, we even thrive on it!

But this time I was far from thriving. I had developed a cold that made my head hurt, my throat sore and my body temperature constantly fluctuate. I was a mess, and my prayers for good health didn’t seem to penetrate God’s heart.

I had no idea how I was going to make it through a 3-day conference. But I knew one thing – I wasn’t going to let the enemy win by quitting. I had to figure out how to make the most of it.

Despite being terrified that I would make a fool of myself with my excessive sweating and hacking, I showed up. Stocked up on cough syrup and throat lozenges, I held my head high, kept my misery to myself and tried to keep a smile on my face. I knew attitude could make all the difference, and I wasn’t about to give anyone a reason to send me home.

More than I wanted the comfort of my bed, I wanted to serve, to make the difference in the life of a few students and bless a few adults. 

Sometimes being faithful isn’t comfortable. 

At all.   

At one point, exhausted and disappointed, I stomped my foot and fought back tears. Why hadn’t God healed my body? Didn’t He want me to succeed? How could I accomplish all these great things for Him if I could barely function?

Now it’s all beginning to make sense. God didn’t take away my illness because He wanted to teach me a few things.

God is a God of order, but His blessing can still be found in the middle of chaos.

  • I learned that during my classes, the students didn’t mind my pauses to sneak a drink of water, cough into my elbow, or run a napkin over my glistening forehead. It was my choice to feel humiliated by my limitations. The students were actually very compassionate, and grateful for my words of wisdom. In 3 years of teaching classes at Fusion, I don’t think I’ve ever felt so appreciated by the students. 
  • I discovered that much can go unseen in a loud auditorium. No one seemed to notice my relentless coughing from where I stood at the back wall. No one commented about how much water I was drinking or the froggy croaking that came out of my mouth when I sang. The vantage point also gave me the opportunity to witness many students having a good time and opening up to the Holy Spirit. I was able to thoroughly enjoy the concerts despite my personal discomfort.
  • I was reminded that when God allows us to experience difficult circumstances, He slips little blessings in here and there, just to remind us that we are loved. He provided a safe haven with food and drink to revive weary workers between sessions (thanks ACWM!). He gave both my kids an amazing God-encounter that warmed my mama-heart. He brought me a dear friend on the last night who stayed with me all evening. And He gave me the courage me to join in the fun on stage with an impromptu adult choir singing a favorite song from my youth – with 4 seconds in the spotlight as the youth pastor stuck a mic in front of me.

Humility comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes.

I learned that last weekend at Fusion Alaska, the statewide youth conference…

Blessings, Jen

About Jen Cudmore

I’m a wife, mom, blogger and novelist who also works a day job in the medical field. I grew up on the Columbia River Gorge, earned a BA in Psychology at Northwest University, and am currently very active in my church. My passion is inspiring women to seek Jesus in all aspects of life so they can recognize where they are living in bondage and be set free to live the abundant life God promises. You can connect with me at

Leave a Reply